Beat the heat by thinking coldWhile our friends on the East Coast are reaching a slow boil as temperatures top 100 and the asphalt buckles beneath their melting flip-flops, we offer this not-so expert suggestion on how to stay cool, at least under the collar: Think cold thoughts.

To get you started, there's a new Minus5 Ice Bar opening next month at the Monte Carlo Resort and Casino in Las Vegas. Minus5, a New Zealand import, opened its first U.S. ice lounge at Mandalay Bay in 2008. The new ice bar will include all the frozen glory of the original, where everything is made of Canadian ice including the bar, tables, walls, benches and even the glasses you drink from. Not sure how your souvenir glass will travel home, but perhaps a photo of it will suffice. And no, I have no idea why Canadian ice is superior to the home-grown variety but it certainly does produce better hockey players.

By the way, the iced environment at Minus5 is kept at 23-degrees Fahrenheit, about what you feel when you stick your head in the freezer every hour. The ice sculptures -- including the one of Elvis -- are recreated every two or three months. Mittens are advised. Pretty dreamy stuff, isn't it?

OK, so you want some more practical tips to stay cool:

  • Remember that heat rises, so stay low. Basements are cooler than second-stories.
  • Stay immersed. A cool bath helps. It's not the beach, but the beaches are plenty hot this week.
  • Turn off lights. Yes, mother was right and they generate heat.
  • Wear all-cotton clothing, that lets the body breathe. Sweat is absorbed by cotton. Gentlemen, remember that when you are tempted to go shirtless.
  • Lose the bangs and find a ponytail holder. Nobody needs hair around their face on hot days.
  • Come to Southern California, which is experiencing daytime highs in the 60s under overcast skies and cloud cover so thick it's making our tourism bureau weep.

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